Make Believe

There is always so much I want to say, but strangely I can't seem to find the words

I've lived a lot of my life in eagerness

And more in regret 

Regret for not taking chances, but then taking one too many

Regret for thinking too much, not feeling enough, and wasting love 

I let it slip 

right between my fingers

and now looking at my fingers I can only think how with these hands i could have loved so much more passionately

I'm divided 

they're not voices 

they're two of me 

a way i want to live and the way i believe i should live

this is how i saw myself 

i painted a portrait for myself 

and I'm living it 

don't i look lovely?

tell me i'm pretty

 why don't you see me that way anymore

am i not everything i wanted?

maybe I let me slip

maybe there was never a love so passionate to waste 

it was all 

make believe

cruisin for love

i wanna see you in the morning

i wanna see you when the breaking day is dawning

we can go cruisin for love together

don't say a prayer for me now

save it till the morning after

driving to nowhere

it's lonely when you're cruisin for love

i wanna see you, see you in the light of the morning

post 1

it seems to pull me in around the same time each year. its almost like my heart doesn't want to forget. did i say heart? i meant mind. my mind can't forget. i seem to be doing so well until fall is done and all the leaves have fallen. november is here. the wind starts to blow. november is done. you've come. you'll linger with december. oh how i hate december. the cold. the snow. unmet deadlines. disappointment.

i come across something you wrote and theres a salty taste on my lips. a tear? for you? never.

see this was our problem, you and i. we couldn't push our pride aside.